Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Does the gentleman protest too much?

A variety of semi-interesting things are going on in my life. Most of my home repair/improvement projects are complete. The last thing I'm going to do is have a ceiling fan installed in the living room on Monday. I took a lot of crummy pictures, but if I can find a few decent one I may do a "before and after" post.

I've started a new exercise regime, but I don't want to jinx it by talking about it too much. I think I've figured out how to ease into some more regular cardio that I can sustain. Here's hoping. 

I'm also in the midst of planning a trip to Iceland with a knitting theme. This is a thing for knitters. I'm leaving in...2 1/2 weeks! I found some traveling companions from my knitting group, we bought the tickets, I found us a place to stay, and negotiated a two-day tour. We are staying about five days so we'll have time to explore Reykjavik and maybe some other country spots. The weather will be cool but not freezing--so perfect for a sweater or two (well, probably one--I have to leave enough room in my bag to bring home enough Icelandic yarn for a NEW sweater).  Anyway, it will be an adventure and good fun.

Back on the dating front, I signed up for a new pay-site and am having absolutely zero luck. A pretty great seeming guy emailed me, but never responded when I wrote back. Others have been less than inspiring. On the free site, I got a couple of nibbles but sent one guy running for the hills when I answered his very short opener with a 200+ word essay. What can I say? I was in a chatty mood. Guess he wasn't. Oh me!

Then today I got a message asking me if I was interested in a "shared massage." He went on to explain that there would be no pressure or expectations, it would just be playfully on the table.  

My first reaction was that it was mighty weird. My second reaction was, this is how guys should ask for casual sex: It's something that we might consider, but it should never be expected. I wrote back and he said he also really likes movies and maybe we could have a coffee and see a movie while we figured out my comfort level. I was charming and clever (no, really!) in my responses and he was amused. I still couldn't shake the oddness of the whole thing and I told him so--that it seemed a little heavy handed (har) for a non-sexual "hands only" massage. (I asked, are massages ever other than "hands only"? I guess the answer is yes--they can be administered internally by penises. No, he didn't use those words.) He got kind of defensive and said he wasn't asking for sex, and he'd never had a one-night stand or ever had "sex" without emotional involvement (he used the quotation marks--what does that mean??).

So, wait, does this mean that his so called "shared touch" could include hands only actions that some would interpret as sex (or "sex")? I am still scratching my head about the whole thing.

Also, how do you get to your mid-50s without ever once having had less than fully emotionally involved sex? I mean, I can see no one-night stands--but what about things that fizzled before they really got started? He has grown kids, so maybe he was married for a really long time, which could explain it. I dunno. I have the feeling he's going to want to teach me things and disapprove of me all at the same time. What fun!

Grateful for: puzzles


  1. Yes does. Nice story and few things reflect me. Wordpress Dating Template

  2. Those are some funny stories! He might be teasing you lol. 200+ word essays seem fine by me but I'm chatty over email as well. I have had good luck with eHarmony. Good luck to you!

    1. Thanks! In fact, the one I wrote the long email to did get back to me...and then faded away. Oh well. I need to write another post and finish those stories.

  3. Interesting stories!
    If you want to follow the rules of dating to meet someone new, its time to stop making snap decisions about the people who ask you out for a date. If someone asks you for coffee, it is your responsibility to accept it, barring any issues with safety of course. A date is just a date - not a marriage proposal.

    Cougar Dating

  4. a) I know the above comment is spam, but that is really irritating dating advice.
    b) Shared touch dude creeps me out and doth protest too much.
    c) "They can be administered internally by penises" -- I LOLd.

    1. I hadn't even read the spam comment--usually I delete them. I'll leave this for posterity, but I agree, it's pretty horrifying.

      I really need to update the blog and end these stories--but I didn't meet the massage guy and I feel good about that.


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