Soccer, yes or no?

Soccer season is fast approaching. The first game is in three weeks.

I'm dreading it. Last season was ok, barely. We hardly ever had a full team. Most games, I played all of both halves and I just didn't have the fitness for it. I was completely exhausted by the end of the game and sometimes limping (silly knee). (I have ramped up my exercise this week, but I still may not be in decent shape for the start of the season.) I have no idea if we'll get a better turnout this season. If I knew we would, I'd be more likely to sign up. But I don't know. We still don't have good leadership and I fear that we will be in the same boat. I don't know why the league didn't assign us more players but whatever went wrong may still be wrong. I feel kind of bad because if I don't play then I'm contributing to the problem. Still, it hasn't been much fun for me. So, I made a list of pros and cons....

Pros	Cons
Likely to go, due to group aspect	Not fun
Social	Feel bad, due to lack of skill
Outdoors	Have other more interesting things to do

I think "not fun" is the deal breaker. Why do anything that is actually negative fun? I never, ever look forward to the games. Sometimes, I enjoy the game. I like saying I play...but so what? My life isn't about impressing people with my athletic prowess (thank goodness!).

I think I know what to do. Maybe play again in the summer/fall season.  Take swing dance lessons again--I enjoy that.  Make hiking once a week a regular thing. I can get up early for soccer, so I can get up early for hiking. . Now I just need to find hiking companions (I do know about the groups out there) and I'm all set.

Damn. Why do I still feel guilty about quitting soccer? Sigh.

Grateful for: this awesome webpage that helped me create the table.