Thursday, October 12, 2006

Timing is everything

First, thanks for the all the friendly and thoughtful comments on yesterday's post. I was also tickled that many of you commented on "The Candy Economy." Maybe I should write about candy more often.

Before I get to the meat of today's post, you should know that the "five-date guy" from yesterday's post was, indeed, "Owen." The second guy was "Wayne," a fellow from my office.

Last night, Wayne and I went to the movies. Before the "date" I'd decided, on the advice of real-life friends Nancy and Pele, to casually introduce the information that I'd "just started seeing someone." There were good reasons to do this, not the least of which was that I realized, after a long talk with Nancy, that the "not calling" was more an indication of a pacing difference between Owen and me than a rejection. I could not imagine that I would never hear from him again. When we've been together, there is NOTHING rejecting in his behavior (actions or words). I was freaking out because such a long silence takes me out of my comfort zone. It may be a deal breaker for me, eventually, but I'm not willing to give up yet. Given that, and that I know I like Owen a whole bunch, and that I don't know Wayne very well, and we work together, and I don't want to lead him on, I decided I would try and drop the "seeing someone" info in a conversation, if it were not impossibly awkward. Unfortunately, it made me a little nervous, thinking about it, but we met at the theater (he left work much earlier than I did) and went to see the movie almost immediately, not leaving much room for talking. Isn't that the best thing about the movies ever?

Then, with impeccable timing, Owen sent me a text at 9:15, just as I walked out of the movie theater with Wayne. The phone beeped, I saw it was him but I didn't read the message. Wayne said something like, "I'm not even checking my phone." Which was meant to be a joke.

I said, "Oh, it's the MIA guy I just started seeing." Because I'm smooooth like that. His reaction? A little surprised, but he rolled with it well. There was a very short discussion of the non-caller and I said, "He's better in person." And then we changed to other topics. I actually perked up quite a bit and I realized how uncomfortable I'd been carrying around my deep, dark secret.

Wayne waited for the bus with me, and we chatted happily until it came. I felt a twinge of guilt, but I do hope we can still be friends.

The text from Owen said, "Want to do something this weekend?" I replied with a long-winded "yes" but didn't hear back. I'll call him tonight.

I got a friendly email from Wayne today and it spurred a discussion of the finer points of the movie. I hope this means our friendship is on track.

Grateful for: text messages.

Drop me a line.

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