When I was 23, I cheated on my Seattle boyfriend after I moved to Chapel Hill. I kissed another guy and I never told my boyfriend. (A couple of months later, when I saw that I would get involved more seriously with another man, I broke up with my Seattle boyfriend.)
When I was 27, I slept with my grad school boyfriend (aka vip-ex) after we'd broken up. He'd moved to NY and I vaguely knew he was dating someone else, but he'd come to Chapel Hill to visit me and I thought we might get back together. We didn't.
When I 18, I kissed my best friend's boyfriend (under the influence of illicit drugs--which is no excuse, but I don't think it would have happened otherwise). I was consumed with guilt for months. I eventually confessed. She eventually forgave me. They are married now and we are all still friends.
These things happened 18, 13 and 9 years ago. I felt appropriately bad at the time (well, not so bad about sleeping with vip-ex). I have learned from these mistakes. I have not repeated my mistakes.
After the Philosopher painfully extracted this information from me, he said goodbye.
He said he couldn't handle it. He thought that learning these things about me, at any time, would have caused him to reject me. He said, isn't it better to know how I feel now, rather than in a year?
I agree it's better to know that he's completely insane now rather than in a year.
The Philosopher's standard is so ridiculously high that it's no surprise he is single. It is actually surprising that he has ever had a girlfriend.
Such a view of me (that I am prone to cheat) is completely out of whack with the reality of who I am. My readers who know me in real life know what I'm talking about. I suspect that even those of you who don't know me in real life would think this is ridiculous. I am someone who has learned from her experiences and is a better person for it.
In addition, I am a woman with a date on Friday, Saturday and Sunday.
I have nothing to be worried about.
Grateful for: finding out sooner rather than later.