There are some certainties in life--one is that every time I make a resolution to post more often, I will break it. Another is that every time I promise not to apologize for posting so rarely, I will apologize. Who exactly am I apologizing to? Myself, I guess. There was a time when this blog was so central to my life. Like, if I went on a date with someone and it started to be a relationship, I felt I had to confess about the blog. Hundreds of people read it and parts of my life were unfolding in semi-public. Not so much anymore.
The other day, I had a date with a guy who I've seen off an on since...I think early 2015. That's crazy, right? We get along well and I always enjoy hanging out with him. There've been long breaks when I didn't hear from him and we've even had a few little arguments. Somehow, I don't think he's ever made an appearance on the blog. Maybe he did, but I've gotten very loose with the pseudonyms. I think I used three different ones for the same guy recently! So...we can call him "the musician." That's what he is and explains some, but not all, of his behavior. I let it slip that I had a blog and he got curious. He really wanted to read it--to get my perspective. I think he'd likely be bored especially since he's not featured at all. And who wants to read a blog about all the other people you're not-gf is dating? But if he ever does read, "hi!"
As to life. Work is slow and a little dull. On the upside, I'm not crazy stressed. I spent four weeks out west in September/October and it was pretty hard. Dad is functional but not great. He can still navigate ok but his conversation is limited and he returns to the same topics over and over. I was in Seattle for about five days and it was fine--good even. I came home and after three days was laid low by a virus for almost four weeks. I'm finally starting to feel normal and contemplating a quick December trip back to Oakland. I'm already tired.
Grateful for: a quiet time.