Sunday, August 31, 2014

Time

Let's see--a coda from that last date-gone-wrong. I did eventually hear from the fellow in question and all he could do was apologize. He said he "got in over his head." WTF? I was great, attractive, smart, blah, blah...but that was it. It did help a little just to know for sure that he'd changed his mind and wasn't lying in a ditch somewhere. I don't think I'll ever understand what went wrong...and maybe it wouldn't help. I would like to learn something but maybe this isn't that situation.

Anyway, I was on the West Coast for about 10 days and I had a good time. Generally got along with both parents. Dad is usually easier and the problem tends to be I get irritated with him--but I was calm and it was pretty easy. I think it may be better to see him on his home turf where he is more comfortable. That's kind of a drag for me since I don't really love going out to Berkeley, but I need to make more of an effort. Things with Mom were pretty easy too. We snapped a little but she started doing this thing where she called out what was bothering her and it helped diffuse things.

In both cases, I think it helped that I had other things to do so I couldn't be with either parent 24-7. In California, I was attending a conference in San Francisco. I didn't go everyday, but it gave my visit purpose and direction. In Seattle, I had a ton of work to do. That got me out of the house and focused on other things. Mom was able to continue her normal life and not worry about me. Which, of course, she never needed to do but would anyway.

Work is going well too. I'm starting to enjoy it more. I like the challenge of being a project manager and delegating the work. Doing the work...not as much fun, but I'm figuring that out too. Actually running things and making it work is like a puzzle--and I like puzzles.

I have even been out on a couple of dates with a new guy. I'm not sure how I feel about him--yet we've already met twice. Both meetings were short--in total maybe half the time I spent with on that one date with the last guy. This new guy, he's ok. He's kind of cute. He's age appropriate. He's divorced with teenage kids (yikes--not bad, just makes me feel old). I don't think we want the same thing, but then again, do I really know what I want? I guess I'm trying to figure out if it's worth bothering. After all, you can't always get what you want.

Grateful for: time to sort things out.

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