Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Rife

I've always really appreciated being Jewish this time of year. (Especially when I see the frenzy so many knitters get themselves into. Wow.) Work is very quiet, which is great, but it's also a lonely time socially since so many people are out of town. Thus, I'm trying to take a lot of yoga and get a drink at a bar a couple of times, mostly for the human contact.

Work let out early on Friday and I caught a movie and ate dinner with a friend. I was supposed to go on a hike on Saturday, which would have been a great day for it, but I couldn't muster the energy. I pulled a "bad friend" move and canceled in the morning. Luckily, my friend was understanding. I swore the next day would be different, and I signed myself up for a 2-hour yoga session, which had a major meditative element involving forgiveness.  Work is still pretty much a disaster (great big fight with horrible supervisor on Friday), so that sounded about right. I need to forgive her and, failing that, I need to forgive myself. Both, really.  Anyway, this was at the yoga studio about a 2-mile bike ride from my house. the one that's two blocks away was also having a two-hour session, but it involved saying "om" 108 times and I couldn't handle it.

I roused myself on Sunday and made it out to the studio right on time. Not many folks were there--about eight of us.  The physical parts were challenging but not impossible. Then we got to the meditative, breathing section. And there was an optional chant. and the word used in that chant wasn't "om" but sounded exactly like the name of the place where I work.  Well. No fuckin' way. I almost burst out laughing.  But, I stifiled and managed to get through the whole thing, though I just listened and didn't chant. Afterwards, I talked to the instructor and told him about the sound of the word. I talked to another lady who was lingering (the partner of the teacher, I suspect). We talked about where I work and how it's doing good things, despite challenges, politics, etc. Then I said, it was a great place to work in many ways, but that I was having a terrible time there because of my horrible supervisor and I can't figure out how to fix it. I stood to leave and the instructor gave me a hug and said "Merry Christmas!" Yes, I look that sad.

Yesterday, I went for a jog in the morning (more of a lope). Then hung around and did a lot of knitting. I signed up for a yoga class on Monday evening but couldn't deal so I canceled. I fell asleep on the sofa around 5pm for an hour. Then I got up and went to a bar, had a snack, a beer and a free shot of whiskey. I talked a little to the bartender, but that was it. It was all couples, families and pairs of friends. Lordy. 

Today, it's back to work and no horrible supervisor to torment me. Tonight it's "restorative" yoga. Tomorrow it's a jog/lope in the morning or at the gym. Thursday it's more yoga.  And on and on until I find another job that can take me away from this mess.

Grateful for: understanding strangers.

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