Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Frustration

I am hoping that, soon, all of my frustration will dissapate. That I will stop taking it out on strangers (no problem, actually) and stop thinking about it all the damn time (huge problem). Talked to an old friend on Saturday and he's engaged. He got married over ten years ago, had two kids, then got divorced about two years ago and he's already engaged. Also, he didn't bother to tell me and who knows when he ever would have. I don't want to care and I don't care much, but it's making me feel a bit uneasy. A bit...frustrated. Like, what is the deal when I have friends getting started on their second marriages when I haven't even come close to having one? What is UP with that? What is wrong with me?

Ok, enough ranting. I've been told that this doesn't reflect on me in the slightest (duh) and I need to stop feeling weird about it. Done!

That said, the super young and not terribly attractive guy I had a date with last week wants to go out with me again. I was so unkind to him, it makes no sense that he would be interested. But he was. I told him no.

I do have a date with a more age-appropriate fellow on Thursday, though, so that's good. Plus a group outing on Friday.

Oh, on that--my new group of friends somehow managed to leave me off of a couple of invite emails. No big deal. My good friend. C-money, who I brought into the group, noticied this but DID NOT INCLUDE ME. Instead, he sent me an oblique message asking if there were  any hidden tensions in the group. Little did I know he meant, "do you have some problems with anyone in the group and is that why they didn't include you in the mass invite to X?" I have to say--NOT COOL. First, I am your good friend for a loooong time. I introduced you to these folks. They took a liking to you and now we are all part of one big happy group of not-very-close friends. But, when you think the group may be excluding me, instead of simply including me by forwarding a message or adding me to the reply list next time you email, you subtly ask if I've done something to be excluded.

ARGH!!! Where is your loyalty, man? Also, we were all doing a big group thing not a week ago, and as you could easily see, all was well.

I know he won't change, but it just kills me that I went to the trouble to do something nice by introducting him to a new social circle and he's ready to drop me to the curb if it turns out they don't like me. Really? REALLY?

Nah, I'm not angry. Not at all.

Grateful for: the perspective that is coming any minute now.

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