Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Ridiculous

Ridiculous is when you have a reunion of three old friends, two of whom get in a heated debate about nothing important (though a topic that can clearly arouse strong feelings), and one of the debaters leaves in a huff AFTER calm is restored.

What can I say about my old friends? They are difficult. I am one of the difficult ones. I did not leave in a huff though it was mighty tempting. I wouldn’t do that to Mike. I so admire Mike’s ability to say calm in the face of so much nonsense. Not that I think I was wrong—no, I think I was attacked. I think I was trying to discuss issues, and not personalize the topic. I was told that my opinion wasn’t valid because I don’t have kids. I was told that since “the research” that I mentioned wasn’t in my area I couldn’t know anything about it and therefore I couldn’t cite it. I was then pressed to produce citations (which is possible but which I couldn’t do on the spot—but is that really necessary?).

In the old days, when I first met this friend, before we actually became friends, he used to go after me. It’s not like we’ve never argued since then but I can’t remember anything this heated for many, many years. I’m very disappointed that the evening took this turn. I’m not sure if I’m supposed to apologize or what. I guess it’s my fault that I rose to the bait, but, I have to ask, why was he baiting me? Oh sigh. What a fiasco.

At least I’m not the one who stomped out. And at least I got to spend the rest of the evening with Mike and we had a decent time. I don’t think he’s mad at me, so that’s something.

Here’s hoping for a couple of peaceful days in Seattle before I head home.

Ridiculous is when you have a reunion of three old friends, two of whom get in a heated debate about nothing important (though a topic that can clearly arouse strong feelings), and one of the debaters leaves in a huff AFTER calm is restored.

What can I say about my old friends? They are difficult. I am one of the difficult ones. I did not leave in a huff though it was mighty tempting. I wouldn’t do that to Mike. I so admire Mike’s ability to say calm in the face of so much nonsense. Not that I think I was wrong—no, I think I was attacked. I think I was trying to discuss issues, and not personalize the topic. I was told that my opinion wasn’t valid because I don’t have kids. I was told that since “the research” that I mentioned wasn’t in my area I couldn’t know anything about it and therefore I couldn’t cite it. I was then pressed to produce citations (which is possible but which I couldn’t do on the spot—but is that really necessary?).

In the old day, when I first met this friend, before we actually became friends, he used to go after me. It’s not like we’ve never argued since then but I can’t remember anything this heated for many, many years. I’m very disappointed that the evening took this turn. I’m not sure if I’m supposed to apologize or what. I guess it’s my fault that I rose to the bait, but, I have to ask, why was he baiting me? Oh sigh. What a fiasco.

At least I’m not the one who stomped out. And at least I got to spend the rest of the evening with Mike and we had a decent time. I don’t think he’s mad at me, so that’s something.

Here’s hoping for a couple of peaceful days in Seattle before I head home.

Grateful for: partial sanity.

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