Monday, June 15, 2009


Nearly a week without a post. It has happened before but mostly because I was too busy, had no privacy or no internet access. That's the not the reason this time. The reason this time is that I've lost my focus, my clarity, my urgency about writing. I've grown disconnected from this place, from the "dating" theme. The gratitude theme, though, is still relevant and always will be since I can easily fall into a funk. As to dating, it's not like there isn't plenty of material. I am still dating Curt and he says enough funny/ridiculous/outrageous/smart things that I could fill many pages with the stories. But I won't. Heck, I'm not even writing in my paper journal, even though I've been carrying it around for weeks.

Sigh. This is just the kind of thing I don't want to write. Aimless, formless, indecisive.

I keep noticing all the people I walk by on my daily commute. Today, a woman on the bus asked me (in Spanish) if I spoke Spanish. I said (in Spanish), "A little." She asked something about "catorce" (which means fourteen). I didn't know if she meant the street or the bus. I told her the bus went to fourteenth street. Later, after leaving the bus, with my ears full of ipod, I passed a young man having a rather vigorous argument with himself. I couldn't hear what he said since I was plugged in. He didn't look crazy otherwise but he definitely wasn't on his phone.

I don't know. I don't know where I want to go with this space. I need a name change or a new blog or a long break or something.

Grateful for: options.

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