Sunday, May 24, 2009

Telling

I started writing something the other day about my need to talk to my friends about what is going on in my life. In particular, I miss talking to Pele--but it's not like I haven't told half the world the little there is to tell about Curt.

Then, the other day, I told him about the blog. I suppose I didn't have to tell but it came up organically...so I did.  He was at my place, examining my books, as is his wont. He said, "why do you have this one?" I said, "It's a review copy--they wanted me to review it."

He said, "Really. How'd you get that gig?"

"Um. On account of my blog."

"Oh ho! You have a blog. What kind of blog?"

I said, "Well, it's about dating. It's a personal blog."

"What's the name of it?"

"No."

"Tell me."

"No."

"C'mon."

"No."

He said, "Ok. Do people at work know about it?"

"No!  But some of my other friends do."

We talked on the phone today and he asked me a few more questions, 'when did you start writing?' 'do you write daily?' 'do you have regular commentors?' I said, 'about four years ago' 'I used to' and 'Yes.' I explained that I used to get a lot of comments on angsty posts and that I used to have a lot more details--I'd write out whole conversations (see above, heh) but since I only write 1-3 times a week now and I have a lot fewer personal details, it's (probably) not as engaging and I don't get as many comments. Then I said something about writing humor pieces and he seemed surprised.

In general, he is pretty surprised at how funny I am. I find it bizarre and fascinating that he had such a wrong impression of me. The other day, he told me that he used to think that I was an unhappy person--but that he realizes that I'm actually quite light-hearted. Well, yes, I am fundamentally serious but constantly poking fun at myself. How did he miss this? It occurred to me that the group context in which he knows me (all work people) probably wasn't the best showcase of my personality. Undoubtably, we talked about work a lot--a subect about which I rarely have much to say that's very positive--and I was with a group of people who I don't like very well. Or maybe he just missed it. But, he gets it now, and with really 'getting' it--I feel a shift in his attitude towards me. I knew he liked me before, but now I can feel it too. I'm pleased.

Grateful for: second impressions.

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