Too much

Too much knitting! In my knitting, I seem to hit a kind of critical mass when I have many projects going or planned. My head starts buzzing and I get a little hyper thinking about all the projects. That's when I know it's time to slow down, finish a few things and not add anything new to the list for a while. It's when the need for completion overwhelms the need for process.

The current list breaks down something like this...

On the needles:

1. Black cotton/wool/elastic lace socks (me)
2. Black wool/poly lace socks (me)
3. Sock yarn scarf/mini-shawl (me)
4. Lace-weight scarf (young niece)
5. Black & white alpaca scarf (me)
6. Plain black scarf (me)

Also, yes, I need that many scarves. #6 is to replace my current favorite long black (machine made) scarf that is full of moth holes.

Numbers 1 & 2 have been hanging around for a while. Socks with a lace pattern in black require a certain amount of care and attention and I haven't had the focus for them. Both are knit toe-up and I'm past the heel turn on both, so they will get finished eventually.

Number 4 combines special bought yarn with yarn on hand so it's a semi-stash buster. Because I'm knitting a scarf out of delicate yarn, it will take forever. Because my niece is still under five feet tall, I don't have to make it super long. Then again, if she really likes it and wants to wear it for years to come, I should aim for at least five and a half feet. At least it's a very simple design so fairly mindless knitting--at least as mindless as you can get with yarn this fine.

Number 5 is knit with yarn left over from a baby blanket (for niece #3). I had quite a lot of this stuff and on a whim, I knit it up very quickly into a garter stitch scarf. I have a whole ball left, which may or may not be enough for a hat. Or gloves. Or something. I will match! Technically, it's on the needles, but it's actually done, unless I decide to ditch the hat idea and make it longer. Or, if I do mitts, I'll have extra, and I could use the rest of it to make the scarf longer. It's pretty loud, so would a hat be too much? I dunno.

Planned:

1. Beret-style hat (Katie or me. If I really like it, I'll make another one for Katie.)
2. Hat with bear ears (Tomo)
3. Tam-style hat in black & white (me, see above)
4. Short-sleeve sweater (me)
5. Fingerless mitts (sister-in-law)
6. Half-finger gloves (nephew)
7. Baby blanket (soon-to-be married niece, can wait for a while)
8. Half-finger gloves (JenA)

I have the yarn for all of these projects--and more that I haven't listed. The excess (not listed) yarn will eventually yield: two pairs of socks, a bunch of baby stuff, a few hats and (potentially) several pairs of gloves. None of that is high on my list, so no need to even enter the planning stage. But how do I approach all this knitting without making myself crazy?

Because I'll be going to Israel in late October for a wedding, I will aim for the niece scarf, nephew gloves and sister-in-law gloves to be done by then. The scarf is the challenge, but that's why I already started it. The socks and black scarf will stay on hold. The lace scarf/shawl is halfway done, so I'll keep working on it. The next things to start will be the gloves for nephew and sis-in-law. Both will be relatively fast, since gloves are small and only the half-fingers are difficult. For my SIL, no fingers--executive decision. For my nephew, he requested something quite complicated, stripes, elbow-length, flip-top and a pocket! But he's five, so they will still be fast due to his relatively small size.

As soon as I'm moving forward with those, I think I'll start the black and white hat--so I can have a matching hat and scarf this winter! The rest, I don't know, I'll sort it out later. I apologize for the boring nature of this post, but I have to say, it's really helpful for me to see it all written down and semi-categorized.

Oh, and you say you'd like to hear about my second date with the guy on Saturday? Well, it was pretty much a disaster. Somehow, I seem to get along worse with people who think they are super left-wing but are actually a bit to my right politically than with the more truly conservative. Their pallid liberalism (non-classical variety) is disheartening to me. Along with this guy's dissing of my neighborhood, I'd say we had a bust. No, really, he dissed the commercial street nearest to where I live for the flaw of being overrun with hipsters. I tell you, my neighborhood is JUST starting to emerge as a nightlife destination after, oh, about 50 years of neglect. Today the street is still dominated by empty store fronts, carry-out restaurants and check-cashing places. Yes, we do have more hipsters and I say, THANK YOU hipsters. We need more of you. When he started on this line, I said, "I'm sorry my neighborhood offends you." He paused and then kept right on with the justifying. Sigh. Haven't heard from him since and, while I admit that I could have been a LOT nicer on our date, and if I wanted things to go forward a very mild apology (probably deserved) would do it. I was mildly argumentative, like when I questioned his statement that reason "millennials" were spoiled and peevish is that they weren't beaten as children. I know! Hilarious! Not. So, I could say, "Hey, sorry about the other night. Let's try again." But I don't wanna. So, I won't.

It's ok, more time for knitting.

Grateful for: lots of yarn.

PS My weekend was actually quite pleasant because I hosed a couple of lovely young women from Slovakia. They stayed two nights and were wonderful house guests. Their second night, they cooked me an authentic Slovakian meal--after earlier treating me to lunch and a beer. Very nice. I may go visit them on the way to Israel...we'll see!

Diffuse

The whole Mom-wants-to-go-to-Israel thing came to a head much sooner than I expected when I received a short email from her today, part of which read, "Given your reluctance to discuss travel together, I will see about making my own plans. I don't need any unnecessary rejections at this time."

Ouch and OY. Oh Mom, I do love you, but why are you so crazy? I emailed what turned out to be a satisfactory explanation, namely that I already feel pulled in several directions on my Israel visits and one more direction was going to make me feel even more unhappy due to my inability to meet everyone's expectations.

She was receptive to that explanation, and my proposals of some alternate trips, though she'd still like to meet me in Egypt or Turkey for the before or after possible vacation part of my trip . So, no vacation for me! Hello meeting other people's expectations. Still, that's ok, it's what needs to happen, I suppose, and since the idea of a relaxed vacation is still kind of foreign to me, let's go with it. (I mean, I spent much of my time in Paris completely relaxed and doing practically nothing except knitting and watching tv, so I've had that...and I will need some of it again someday. Maybe a three-day weekend of nothing near home would be a good idea.)

Anyway, Mom wrote in her friendlier message, "I do realize you try to please your demanding family. Why I am not sure, but that is another story. I have no interest in competing for your attention during the wedding event."

This raises some questions for me:

1. Is she part of the demanding family or is that everyone else?
2. Does she really not know why?

Even though it's "another story" I did address it a bit in my next email. Basically, I said that I know that everyone's happiness is not dependent on mine (natch), but that I feel like it is, a bit, especially when I feel like everyone wants a piece of me. I also said I felt vain writing that. I don't know WHY everyone wants a piece of me. What is so great about me? I am grateful, though, that they love me and like me enough to want me around. Given that, I cannot help but try and make myself available. This leads me to trying to make people happy, get along and not fight. This was my role as a little kid when my parents were fighting all the time and it's not surprising that it's the position I get in with family. It's completely impossible.

(Aside: I found the way I worked for Pele's shower completely satisfying. I was needed, they leaned on me and I loved that. I wanted that. I didn't need to have fun at the party, I needed to be part of the family. Obligation makes me feel included.)

I suspect Mom won't come on this trip in the end, since she's not much of a traveler and I haven't been terribly receptive. If she doesn't, I'll make an effort to go on some other adventure with her in the not too distant future.


On a completely different topic, I was thinking about my date on Monday and the many stories I told. The theme of many of these stories was me losing my cool. Now, I don't think of myself as a particularly collected person, but true anger is fairly rare. Yet I told him at least two stories about incidents that made me very angry, one about a boyfriend (ancient history) and another about work (relatively recent). I also told a couple more trivial frustration stories as well as some non-angry stories, but still, what was I thinking?

I've often realized in retrospect that the stories I tell on a date are directly related to my state of mind. Because I'm nervous, words pour out of me, and I don't think so carefully about what I'm saying. I do try and craft the stories themselves well. It's all about the presentation.

I have to think that these stories were a kind of cautionary tale. "Be careful, I'm not as nice as I appear," perhaps. Possibly, "don't cross me, you'll pay." Or, more likely, "don't get too close to me, you don't realize what you're signing up for." (Oh, and "by the way, my heart is not exactly available, so you may not want to bother--and see, here are a bunch of angry reasons to avoid me!") I feel like the last one (or the parenthetical?) is true. I would like to keep a healthy emotional distance between me and anyone except my dearest friends. I was pretty comfortable around this guy, for whatever reason, and I want to see him again. I just don't want to think it's something it's not. I don't want to think at all. I don't want worry and I don't want to keep track of whose turn it is to call or what impression I've made. So, I've decided I don't want anything. If you tell me otherwise, you risk my wrath.

Grateful for: walking weather! A nice long walk home is a good time to relax.

Blogging time: 30 minutes.

Wedding bells

Yesterday, I found out that my niece is engaged and will get married, in Israel, on November 1. (For those of you just tuning in, I have two older brothers, one of whom is an ultra-orthodox Jew and lives in Jerusalem. He has five kids and they get married promptly around age 19-21. I've been to three weddings so far.)

I am planning to go. Ironically? Perversely? I got a summons to jury duty last night, for a special trial in US District Court that will last for eight weeks, starting October 12. I have to ask to be excused. I hope they will excuse me before I buy my plane tickets...though the materials said that I needed to show plane tickets/ reciepts as part of the request for exemption. I am sort of bummed, since I like jury duty. I was on an eight week trial a few years ago and it was fascinating (and terribly dull at times). I'd happily do it again, but the timing is bad. The trip to Israel isn't optional--I promised my niece and I am expected to be there.

In other trip worries, Mom wants to meet me there. I just...I just don't want this. I was vague about it because I'm afraid a firm no will hurt her feelings. The problem is that I'm already torn when I go to Israel. I have a lot of family demands--Dad, Israeli family, all the wedding stuff. It can be stressful. Then I have Spesh, who also wants to see me. He is easier to deal with and I want to give him a fair amount of my time (especially since that's usually more fun than the family time). I already have two things pulling me, add Mom in and it will just be too much. I don't want to deal with her needs, ETC. So, sigh, what will I do about that?

Next, I've been thinking that I want to combine the Israel trip with another more vacation-like trip.  At first I was thinking Egypt or Jordon. I need someone to travel with me to those places and I don't know if that will happen. The other option would be a three legged trip, with a few days on the front or back end in London, Paris or somewhere else. London is tops, since I could see Alicia. Paris is second, because, well, it's Paris and I haven't been back since I lived there and it would be like a mini-homecoming.  The airfares are pretty high now, but it's only an extra $300 or so to include Paris or London. Totally worth it, I think, though late October isn't the best time, weather wise, to visit. I think I'd have a great time: I would wear all my wool clothing, hand knit or otherwise and be plenty warm and dry.

I wish I didn't have to make all these decisions so fast, but maybe that's for the best. Round my plan up in a few days, deal with Mom, talk to Dad, buy some tickets and forget about it for the next two months. That seems like a good idea.

Grateful for: a potential vacation.

A date

I fell off the blogging wagon but not for lack of wanting to write. It's funny how easy I can get knocked out of the routine. I thought about adding some post-dated entries, but, eh, why bother with that mess? I'll just give myself more than the allotted 15 minutes if I need it.

On Friday, I'd actually sketched out a few ideas for a post, but Diego came by to see me (he's not working here anymore, but doing work for us, and was in the building for a meeting). We went down for a coffee, but the cafe was closed, so we just sat and talked...for two hours! I think I miss talking to my friends more often. (I'd just gone out with Pele on Wednesday night, and we sat talking in the car after dinner for at least two hours.)  Anyway, I walked home after that and didn't write.

On Friday, I worked at home, interspersing work with prep for Pele's baby shower on Saturday. I got everything done by Friday night, except for picking up a few more vegetables at the farmer's market on Saturday morning. On Saturday, I shucked the corn and packed everything up to take to her place. It was a lot of work, and a fair amount of worrying about having enough food, but it worked out well. I'd say we had a lot of leftovers but not an amount so excessive that Pele and family wouldn't be able to eat most of them, and that's the desired outcome. Just a little bit too much food.

That shower business was kind of crazy because, except for the cake, some cookies, beer, wine and a (delicious) cheese plate, I provided all of the food. Meaning, since this was a cookout: burgers, sausages, hot dogs, buns, condiments, crudite, three kinds of dip, chips, two baguettes, tiny potatoes (for grilling) and corn. I also got some cheese, for the burgers, but left it at home. Maybe it wasn't too crazy but it felt like a lot of work, especially since, in the end, I had the primary grilling responsibility. Hey, I know my way around a grill, and sweaty though it was, I was happy to do it.

After that, I met Diego (again!) to see "Xanadu," a film that I'd deliberately missed up until then. What utter nonsense! Still, a few amusing moments and hearing Diego say, "I used to like that movie. It's kind of embarrassing." were well worth it.

Sunday, I was a bum. Ok, I did a bit of knitting and mopped the kitchen floor (and made corn pancakes with some of the leftover corn on the cob). Mostly, I hung around the house, feeling exhausted, and dropping off to sleep unexpectedly on the sofa while trying to be entertained by mindless tv.

I was also in date negotiations with an internet guy, and he tried to get me to meet him on Sunday night, but I was too tired to commit. Instead, we went out last night (Monday).

Way to bury the lede! Yes, I actually went on a date. A real, live date, that I moderately looked forward to and and that didn't end in disaster.  In fact, he asked me out again. I said yes, but wouldn't commit to a day. I have some couchsurfing guests this weekend and I feel the need to protect my alone time. What I don't particularly feel the need for is a boyfriend. And this fellow, he is boyfriend material. Maybe not for me...but for some nice girl. And I...well, no matter why kind of craziness I get up to, no matter how hard I try to shake it, will probably still be perceived as a "nice girl" until I'm on my deathbed. All this to say, I don't think I'm actually in the market for a boyfriend. I mean, who knows, maybe this fellow will grow on me, and we'll get together and good things will happen. Or maybe, that's what he'll want and I'll have to gently send him away. Or maybe, he just isn't interested and I'm thinking too much. (Definitely the last one!)

I know I need to reach out to him since I was vague about future plans and he asked at least twice:
1) "Did you have fun? Do you want to do this again?" Yes, I said.
2) "What do you have going on this weekend? Do you have any free time." I'm not sure, I said.

So, there you go, an actual prospect. He is cute, attractive..wavy dark hair and kind eyes, nice full lips, and sort of cuddly. Does that sound bad? I actually really like his looks and would have been all over him except that he might've gotten the wrong impression. Plus, natural shyness keeps me from being too forward on a first date, unless extreme amounts of alcohol or foreign travels are involved. Silly me! Maybe I'll write him tomorrow. I can play a little hard to get, right?

Grateful for: not being totally hopeless.

Time: 25 minutes.

All wet

Today, I had an early (for me) doctor's appointment. Do you think 8:20 is early?  I showed up, about 10 minutes late, nervous that I'd get in trouble. As it turns out, my doctor wasn't even there.  He had a basement flooding problem, which is unfortunate and not shocking because it was raining to beat the band this morning and has continued on and off all day.

They said to come back at 10am. Annoying, that was, because it didn't really give me enough time to go to the office. I asked if they could call me, but no, they couldn't. And they discouraged me from calling them. Heck, why not just sit in the waiting room for an hour and a half and see what happened? Yeesh.

I ended up walking to a near-ish coffee shop where I ate some breakfast and read my magazine for about an hour. Then I went back to the doctor's office. I still beat him there but I only had to wait another 10 minutes before he saw me.

The doctor is a specialist, one of those who likes to examine my blood. The good news is that I can stop taking the medication he prescribed to treat what turns out to be a non-condition. I seriously hated taking this medication, since the pills were the proverbial "bitter" ones. They were literally BITTER. If I took one before eating, my food would taste "off." The best time to take one was right before I brushed my teeth, but I had to take them 3x a day for a while, so that didn't really work. Anyway, at least for now, I don't have to take them at all and I am delighted and relieved. (Sorry to be coy about my "condition" but needless to say, it was never serious and now it doesn't even exist, so yay!)

In the end, I was only about an hour late for work, and it's still a slow, quiet time around here, which is great. As a sign of how many people are gone, I just sent a big old mass email and got five "vacation" messages in return. That's an all time high! No one is here and I like it.

Have you noticed that of the very few comments I'm getting about 50% are spam? No, you're probably not reading the comments. I don't blame you. Oh, someone said the sweater pics showed *me* off nicely, as well as the sweater. I would like to thank you for that comment but point out that they were strategically edited and perhaps showed me looking not quite as I would appear in real life. Floating torso pics certainly have a tendency to distort one's actual shape.

Ah, in dating news! There is no actual dating news, but I got an interesting email via my active but rarely checked free online dating account. This fellow and I have been emailing back and forth for a few days and will make plans as soon as our schedules calm down. I'm enjoying our one email per day pace. That feels about right and it's what I have time for.  We seem to be living in parallel universes since we both spent most of Sunday in the same neighborhood doing almost the same things. I've noticed that it feels more "right" getting together with a stranger when you can decide you would have eventually met anyway, so I'll cautiously call this a good start and hope that it doesn't completely fall apart when we eventually meet. Or should I say if? I will try and stop counting those chickens, but I'm afraid it's a habit that dies hard. Instead, I'll be aware of what I'm doing and just persist anyway because hope is good. Where would we be without hope?

Grateful for: hope.

15 minutes

Today, I literally have 15 minutes to write. I promised myself I'd leave the office at a specific time. If I don't, I'll be late to meet people. I tell you, I am a champion dawdler. It's ridiculous. I got up this morning a little before 7am. But I didn't leave the house until 8:50. I don't have any reason for this. I never "do" my hair. If all goes well, I brush it. I don't have a "beauty regime."

This is the morning routine:
Out of bed.
Feed the cat.
Floss, brush teeth.
When appropriate, shower, may include shaving legs, washing hair.
Wash face.
Apply moisturizer to face.
Brush hair.
Constrain hair with clip or rubber band.
Apply sunscreen to other exposed skin (upper chest, maybe arms).
Deodorant, perfume.

Apparently, this is a seriously minimal routine. Maybe takes half an hour when I shower.

Sometimes I do a little 5 minute exercise routine.

Then I pick out my clothing and dress. Tedious, but it doesn't take too much time. I could easily be out of the house in 45 minutes. An hour if I ate some breakfast.

But, no, it takes almost two hours to leave the house. Why? I'm reading blogs. Seriously! I am reading blogs all morning. It starts in the bed, via iPhone. Continues when I get to the computer. I also read and answer emails. Check the bank statement. Download stuff. Whatever. It's all just puttering because I don't really want to leave the house, especially when there's nothing pressing at the office.

The office isn't so bad this week. Last week, my supervisor was on vacation. This week, she's in training every day. It's like a two week vacation for me. I got a few things done today, which felt good. Little things, but every little bit counts.

You know, when I came back from France, it was with one particular project in mind. I thought that I would finish that project and then maybe I would leave this job (and go back to England and be with Kent). But, I haven't touched that project in months. I never really got started with it. It wasn't ready for me when I got back and working on it properly would leave zero time for anything else. All the other work is so much more interesting. Problem is, that old project is looming over me and while it's still there, I should always be busy. Maybe I really do need to start coming in on the weekends and just get it DONE.

Anyway, wow, I have to say, I can write a surprisingly large number of words in a mere 13 minutes. I'll leave off and save the last two for proof reading. Cheers.

Grateful for: interesting work.

Tired

On Saturday, I attended a party mere blocks from my front door. Lovely! The party was fine, though everyone was a lot younger than me (fine), mostly in couples (ok), and somehow not super interesting (probably my fault for not trying harder). Still, I had a decent time, talked to a few new people, told a few stories and certainly was reasonably social and engaged. Yes, I can still go to a party and mingle. Do I want to as much as I used to? Apparently not.

Anyway, the best story about the evening doesn't involve the party except in a tangential way.  On my way over, I stopped at liquor store to pick up a six. A man, in my general age range (though younger), was at the counter and paying for a bottle of liquor. I walked out soon after he did and almost bumped into him when he stopped to send a text message. He apologized for blocking the sidewalk and I made a joke about the dangers of texting and walking.

Soon, I was at the gate of my friend's building--you need to dial up and get buzzed in. Just as my friend answered, my liquor store/sidewalk/text buddy showed up. He said, "Hi!  I know you." and opened the gate for me, while asking me to hold the carry bag with his liquor (yes, it was odd, but one of his fingers was in a little splint, so I think that's why he needed help).

I hadn't been to the building complex before, so I asked for directions and my new friend, Brad, walked me to the right building. We chatted along the way and Brad said he was having a little party in his apartment too.

Brad also said something like, "Which building is your boyfriend in?" I said, "Well, if he were my boyfriend, I would probably know where to go." Brad laughed and said, "Yeah, that's probably true." We got on the elevator together and when  we got to Brad's floor, he leaned in close and half whispered, "It's Brad, in 620, if you want to come by." I could smell the liquor on his breath. I didn't say anything and he exited the elevator. I was highly amused.

I am sorry to report that I did not stop by.

On Sunday, I got up early-ish to go meet my friend Alicia, who was visiting from London for work. We spent the whole day together, including lunch and a movie with C-money. It was delightful. I talked her ear off and she is so good and sympathetic as a listener that I may have taken a little advantage. Still, I hope she didn't mind. Sometimes there is really nothing better than seeing an old friend and pouring your heart out. Introducing two old friends is quite a rare and fun thing too. Alicia kept asking when I'd be visiting her and I didn't have an answer. She said that C-money and I should come together, which is highly unlikely, but would be a jolly good time. I think the only time we've traveled together was an ill-conceived overnight drive to Iowa with Spesh for a wedding. Well, we didn't fight then, so who knows how a trip to Europe would go?

I am feeling the need to go somewhere sometime but I'm waiting until I have an urge towards a specific place to make my plans. Just found out that niece number three got engaged, which means a trip to Israel is happening relatively soon--maybe November or December? I suppose I could combine it with London (though, bad time of year for that)...and see if C-money wants to come along and see Spesh? Not the worst idea ever. We'll see.

Grateful for: international friends.

Let me tell you a little about this weekend...it's busy. First, on Friday, Katie asked me to a party. Sounded like fun and it was sort of in my neighborhood, so I gladly accepted the invitation. We made plans to have dinner first. It was a good evening, though the food was slow in coming and by the time we left, the noise level was so high that we couldn't hear each other. The only unfortunate part of the evening was that Katie's contact/eye was bothering her, she had to take the lens out and then go home to replace it. I managed to leave my wallet at work and had to go to the office to retrieve it.  After the dinner that was served so slowly and our various to-ing and fro-ing, we never did make it to the party. No great loss, I suspect. Not that I ever object to a party.

Today, I did some shopping and made and froze 20 hamburger (5 lbs) and 8 turkey (2 lbs) patties for Pele's baby shower next weekend. I also bought other food for the shower and will have to buy and make (brownies, dip) still more by the end of the week. (Yes, I volunteered. Yes, I am complaining a little. But look at me go!) I sure hope I have enough meat--or that I don't have too much? (About 20 guests are expected--any advice on whether I need more meat is appreciated. I'm also getting about five pounds of hot dogs/sausages. That's just a heck of a lot of meat. 27 pounds? That has to be too much.)

Tonight, a friend is having a get together. Awesome, because I can walk there in about 5 minutes. And, I don't really know any of this friend's friends, so it could be very interesting.

Tomorrow, Alicia, friend from England (previously college), is in town and we're spending a lot of the day together. Haven't seen her since I've been back from France. Last time I saw her was at her house, with Kent, over Christmas 2008. Sigh.

Then I have plans straight through to Wednesday. And, actually, to the end of the week, since I have to go grocery shopping on Thursday (or Friday) and do some cooking on Friday. Maybe I can do some of the cooking on Saturday morning, but I've found it's wise to do as much ahead of time as possible in case there's something you've forgotten about...then you still have some last minute open time to take care of it.  Hmm...normally I work at home on Monday. Maybe I can swap with Friday this week. A mid-day trip to the store will be a lot less hassle than driving around on Thursday or Friday night.

I cannot believe I'm using this blog to puzzle out my time management. Presumably, when something interesting is happening, I will share.

Oh, here's something that I think is interesting--the sweater I recently finished knitting has been getting a TON of view on ravelry, the site many knitters and crocheters use to catalog their projects. It's really exciting for me to get so many views, comments and have people "favorite" the sweater. Now, I'm going to put a couple pics of it here. They are with my head chopped off, which is creepy, but you can see the sweater pretty well, which is the point.

Grateful for: sweater love.

Scenario

Well, that's what I get for laying out scenarios. Last night, I was supposed to meet this fellow after work. I sent him an email an hour or so ahead of time to confirm. I didn't hear back from him, but giving the vicissitudes of email, I went ahead to the appointed place.

I ordered a drink and I waited about half an hour. He never showed. So, I guess the worst case was being stood up. I mean, maybe not. If someone is a big enough ass to stand you up, perhaps the hour we might have spent together would’ve been pretty unbearable. As it was, I had a good drink, read my “New Yorker” and went home in plenty of time to cook myself a nice dinner. I would have chatted with other folks if the opportunity arose, though it didn’t. Still, VERY annoying. When I got home, there was no email from him, so we’re 100% done. Sigh. Like I said, very annoying. Not really disappointed, since it was a first meeting, but I did feel a bit discouraged. I’ve been stood up before, usually by good friends who have decided to blow me off for no good reason (at least once it was a misunderstanding), and I have to say, those times felt a lot worse. Because I actually cared about those people and their friendship meant something to me. In this case, not so much. But still.

Today is another day struggling with the computer, which they say will be fixed by Monday, and not getting enough of this editing done. I finished chapter one yesterday, but today I only made it through the first page of chapter 2. I need to work harder at this next week. Other work was done, and that was good. I am just loving this super quiet time at work, though. So many people are gone for vacation, it leads to a very mellow atmosphere. I think I need to plan for a vacation when no one else does, so I can be here when everyone else is gone.

I’ve been thinking a bit about travel recently. I have no plans to go anywhere. I keep feeling like I should. I’m trying to think of a place I want to visit. I can think of several places I’d enjoy seeing but nothing is calling to me. Funny, that. I guess I’ll just keep it in the back of my mind and when the desires comes, I’ll go with it. Or I’ll glom on to someone else’s trip, if they invite me.

Last night, I officially finished the baby knitting. I’m actually a little sad! I foresee knitting many more things for this baby after it’s born. Hopefully, that will make everyone happy, not just me.

Grateful for: future knitting.

Still here

So, I totally spaced on my commitment to blog yesterday. How funny. Thing is, I did have time, but I just don't do this from home. I do it during spare moments in the work day, of which I had many yesterday. But, I'd brought some simple knitting with me and that kept me occupied in the slow times. Today, I still have the knitting, but it's staying in my bag (in case of a knitting emergency).

Before work this morning, I went to get some blood drawn, as is my wont these days. (Don't panic, it's nothing serious, they're just monitoring--that's what those medical types like to do.) Anyway, I got there later than I'd planned, at maybe 9:15am. No one was in the waiting area. I handed in my paperwork and went straight in to the room with the special blood-drawing chairs. There is a guy who works there, I think he's the supervisor (which, actually, is kind of troubling, since the rest of the staff is female and minority--and the one white dude is in charge? Nice.). Anyway, he was my person and he's taken my blood one other time--he does it faster and more painlessly than anyone else, plus he doesn't chat, which is fine by me. Same this time, he is very good at his job. I was in and out of there in less than five minutes. Amazing. Plus, I don't even have a quarter-size bruise in the crook of my arm, which I did after the last time they took my blood.

Work is kind of funny today. We're in the midst of this very busy time but I'm experiencing a lull. I am doing some reading and editing of a report, which is killing me, and it's good I don't have other pressing work to do. The frustration level is so high with this editing job that it leaves me with little energy for other work. It's a lovely relief that the annoying supervisor is gone all week. It makes it so much more relaxing and pleasant to be here. I wish it were this calm and quiet all the time. I do miss my favorite co-worker, though, who is off for the rest of the week.

Tonight, I have plans to meet an internet guy. I don't want to call it a date (at least in the romantic sense, though it is a date in the technical sense), because I'm trying a low/no expectations approach. Sure, I always try that, but I am serious this time! For real. Yet, I was SERIOUSLY annoyed when this fella broke our plans last night with nary a sorry in sight. He did try to reschedule (for tonight) and I relented and agreed, but I'm afraid the annoyance seal has been broken and we may be doomed. Whatever, he is certainly not the love of my life, thus, I don't mind if it doesn't "work out." Nancy (work friend) thinks my plan is doomed too, but for entirely different reasons. I say, since I have no expectations, doom is moot. Worst case, I'm bored for the hour or so we spend together. Medium case, we have a good chat, but decide not to meet again. Best case, well, let's not go there--no expectations, after all. Wish me luck!

Grateful for: a quiet day.